The Everyday Club

4/2/10     Me
Yesterday God reminded me of what I am like when I try to live for Him without Him. I woke up feeling unmotivated to reach out to anyone with the Gospel, and instead of turning to God for strength I listened to sermons on-line while I was grading papers (Mark Cahill has some awesome talks available at his website), and church (Good Friday service), and fellowship. These were all good things, but when done without prayer they can simply become busy-ness and a cheap substitute for the thing I really needed, intimate fellowship with God. I went from being unmotivated to disoriented and indecisive about how to use my time, to frustration and a complete lack of joy. My evangelism goal became a burden rather than the gift of God that it has been in my life. I thought of dozens of excuses and I couldn't even think of approaching anyone with the Gospel in this state of mind, and I drove my family crazy with my negative attitude. I knew from past experience that I needed to spend unhurried time with God in prayer, but I just went to bed, hoping this dreary day would end. "What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?" - Romans 7:24